This love grew all so great that at some point, I wondered if my heart could contain this love. How I wanted to take your pain and hurt when your mother was called home. I hurt deeply with each day that I could not spend by your side, to comfort you, to heal you with my love and to speak comforting words to your heart.
I gave all that I had to this process of growth in our relationship. Yet you noticed not. I sat at home and drowned myself in tears as you chased lovers that won’t satisfy. You deepened my wound with your actions and words as the months rolled by.
I prayed to be taken home to my Father when you sent me a text that you were marrying another.“Getting married next year, insha’allah. I thank God everyday for her”, you wrote. I felt my dreams slipping away. I cried out to Abba Father and asked Him why He allowed this happen. I asked Him why He would give me to a man who saw not my value in his life.
With each passing day, I felt myself fading away as I ate little. I watched as you paraded her before your friends, as she sang wedding bells all over social media, as you traveled beyond the borders to Togo to meet her family when mine had not beheld your sight.
I fought so hard to hate you with every humiliation I received from you as I tried to win you back. Before your friends, you avoided me and left me standing alone. I made the decision to let you go so you may live the life you wanted. But God had a different suggestion.
He placed words in my spirit to pray on your behalf. Day and night, I stood on my feet and positioned you with my prayers. For I saw you as He did, I saw the man God had anointed to make an impact in this world, the man in whose hands lives of others had been given to lead on the path of Christ. And only I could effect that word spoken before the beginning of time.
So I overlook your cold shoulder treatment and your blatant ignorance of my existence. I have found solace in the words of my Father, which says that He is not a man that He shall lie. He says my life has He made one with yours and so I shall endure a little more.
I write you to tell you that I am not going to leave nor forsake you. I will fight till you become the man He has destined you to be. I will be on my knees till the day you return home.
Till the day my beloved comes home.
Your Jealous Wife.